I saw this today, thought of you.

http://www.zombieharmony.com/

The zombie of your dreams could be out there. Take a chance man.

I’ve been thinking about our recent battle against a crazy anti-zombie wannabe necromancer. Normally taking on a bunch of zombies isn’t a big deal to me. I’m pretty strong for a zombie myself. But I had a scare during that battle when Desmond lost consciousness. CherryPop tells me that it was touch and go with him for a while there. I wouldn’t know. When Desmond loses consciousness, so do I. I don’t mean the kind of consciousness you lose when you go to bed for the night. I mean, near death-type consciousness. It’s different.

In a sense I belong to Desmond. In the old days, I would call him Master and would be his slave. Necromancers have evolved, fortunately. But the connection that binds a true zombie like me to his or her necromancer can be severed at any time. Like during a crucial battle with a bunch of zombies in which my young charge and everyone she loves is at stake.

It’s not very handy. It makes me feel vulnerable. Like I can’t do the job I was Raised to do - protect CherryPop. I gave up a lot to keep her safe. To know that it might all be pointless if, while I’m protecting her, I can just drop like a bag of bricks if my necromancer dies too? It’s harsh. And it’s been bothering me.

Ok. It’s been a very long time since I posted. Guilt is a great motivator. Guilt and a hulking pissed-off zombie looming over you.

Not that I don’t want to blog and Liam isn’t forcing me. Just guilting me I just get distracted. There’s been a lot going on lately and frankly, I’ve been so tired that I come home and all I want to do is tumble into bed and sleep for a thousand years. Been working on the ghost issue. Finally got that sorted out. Turned out Eleanor’s daughterghost, Beth, had decided she’d had enough playing the haunter and took off to see the world. She knew her mother would never let her go, so she basically ran away. How about that? A runaway ghost.

Anyway, with Mom’s help we tracked her down, she agreed to come back and work out things with her mom and all is peachy now.

In other news, the dead are as restless as ever and we still haven’t figured out why. It’s all Dad and I can do to keep up with raisings, settlings, and occasional zombie who is too stubborn to realize they are dead and won’t go back down. It saps just about all of Dad’s strength when we get one of those.

Mom’s working with her coven to try and do their thing to find out what the hell is going on, but no joy so far and I’ve been with Dad every night training and helping. See what I mean about tired?

But I’m still around, and the blog will pick up once we get this sorted out, I promise.

CherryPop is irritated with me pestering her to update her blog so I got fed up and had her set me up on it. I’ll be posting during her lulls. It’s important to keep up interest in Zombie rights and frankly, I’m more of a technonerd than she is. Cherry’s all about action. Get out there and do it, not sit at a desk and talk about doing it.

Oh she’ll still post if I have to tie her to the desk to do it. But there actually is a lot going on right now. There’s the whole ghost thing over at Arthur’s. No progress there and Eleanor’s getting antsy. Then Des came to me the other day and told me he’s starting to get worried about the dead. Now, Des is a laidback kind of guy. For him to be worried about something usually means it’s time to duck and cover. he and Cherry are out right now at LesMortes trying out some rituals with Charlotte to try and get one or two bodies to talk to them and find out what’s stirring them up.

Why am I not with them? I never go with CherryPop when she’s working with Des. For some reason known only to Yoda, the dead don’t like me. Ironic? Yes it is. Actually they don’t much cotton to True Zombies in general, not just me. It’s my theory that they’re jealous once they discover they have to go back into the ground when Des is finished.

So I’m killing time until they finish up, and I’ll meet them later and take over CherryPop watch (She hates it when I call it that.) I just checked her blog and noticed she’s been a little slacker. We will have words about that later on.

Things have been calm for the past few days. There’s been no movement on the Zombie Bill and so we’re in the planning stages of another protest. But I think I will keep the details of that to myself. I really don’t want a repeat of what happened at the last one.

I was just thinking today about how out of the norm my life might seem to the casual passer-by to this website. I mean, yeah ok, there have been some unusual events happening to me all my life beginning with being named ‘CherryPop’ but that’s a post for another day :)  Although, I am shocked, SHOCKED I tell you, to discover that sometimes strippers go by my name. Who knew? Thanks Mom!

But seriously… I went from a cute toddler to a cute toddler who needed bodyguard to protect me from the baddies out there. A zombie bodyguard. A zombie bodyguard who died saving my life. If you’ve read my previous posts, you may have deduced that Liam is the zombie bodyguard in question. And if you’re new to my site, well, Liam is my zombie bodyguard. He’s always nearby and over the years we’ve grown into being friends. I’ve learned to listen to him when he tells me to duck, and he’s learned that I can be a stubborn <insert expletive here> when I want to be. We deal.

So yeah. Occasionally I have to hide or go on the run depending on who’s after me. Sometimes I make a stand. I’m tired of running to be honest. Sometimes I work the Wicca with Mom. Sometimes I speak to the dead with Dad. But other times we’ll all curl up and watch a ballgame or have barbecues with friends.

I don’t really now where I meant to end up in this post. Sometimes I just write, you know? No telling stories, no talking about how I ran out of toothpaste this morning.  Just a ramble. It’s nice. Sometimes.

I thought I’d add a little to the FAQ about zombies tonight. I don’t have much time. Need to get to bed early tonight

Q. Can zombies feel pain?

A. Yes, though it’s not as acute as it would be if the zombie was human. I don’t pretend to know the physiological makeup of a true zombie. I’m no doctor. But my father believes that part of the power used to tie a zombie to his necromancer includes neurological functioning as well as functioning nerve endings. Liam says he feels like they’re deadened (ha!) though. I could smack him upside the head right now and it wouldn’t cause much pain. If I accidentally broke a finger, however, he would feel it.

Q. Speaking of breaking stuff, can zombies heal?

A. On their own, no. But the necromancer that raised the zombie can use that tie between them to sort of “push” more power into the zombie and heal him or her.

That’s all I’ve got time for tonight. I’ll post more tomorrow. Thanks for reading!

Well that was unpleasant. And messy. And sorta gross. I don’t think I really want to blog about it either which is why I didn’t post yesterday. Our next move is to try to track down the people responsible for raising those zombies. I have no idea how we’re going to do it though. Dad thinks we can see if the TV crew that was at the demonstration has any b-roll footage of the crowd, and especially of the protesters. If they have any, Dad and I will sift through it to see if we can spot anyone doing any chanting or other ritual behavior.

It’s a shot in the dark, but we have to try it. Can’t let those morons raise another batch of undead. I don’t think I could stand it.

Liam and I spent the day with my dad gathering the herbs and artifacts he’ll need to undo what those idiots did last night. Dad told me that he was going to need y help on this one because there were so many. I’m nervous about that.

I have studied necromancy, hell, I grew up with it. But my powers lie elsewhere. The most I can give dad is extra strength. If anything goes wrong during the ritual tonight, we’re screwed. Dad seems confident, but I keep picturing us having to wade through them and sever body parts all night. Not fun. Gross actually. You get one chance to put an improper zombie down and if you don’t get it right, then all you can do is chop them into bits and separate the parts in sealed containers. I’ve done it once, on a single zombie. I can’t imagine doing it with a gaggle of them.

I should go prepare. Dad’s just about ready.

The haters showed up at the rally. I was hoping for a simple, stoic demonstration but nothing ever goes the way I want it to. The entire zombie population here was there, which, to the average person might sound like a lot, but in truth, there actually aren’t that many true zombies around.

You see, as I mentioned before, only a trained and qualified necromancer is able to raise the dead, to breathe true life into them. Once they do that, the zombie is forever tied to that necromancer. Metaphysically speaking that is.

My father raised my friend Liam here. Liam can be hung, drawn and quartered yet still he will live. He won’t be particularly happy about it, but he will be alive. So to speak. But if, Elvis forbid, something should happen to my father and he would die (knock on wood, throw salt over the shoulder, spit three times and mutter a lot of Latin) then so would Liam. The necromancer animates the dead with his power. As long as the necromancer is alive, so is the zombie.

So as you can probably guess, necromancers don’t actually raise the dead very often. Too many zombies will eventually weaken the necromancer.  So after a very long explanation,  there just aren’t a whole lot of true zombies out there.

But the haters… God I can’t believe what they did tonight. It was awful. These people (and I use that term lightly) can’t seem to get past the stereotype. Too many movies have skewed perception so badly and some of the ones among the haters have *just enough* knowledge to make them dangerous. They know that an improperly raised zombie will be very much like the zombies depicted in movies like “Night of the Living Dead” and “Shaun of the Dead.”

Can you see where I’m going with this? Those idiots actually hit the local cemeteries last night and attempted to raise a LOT of dead folks. They did not gain the permission of the families. They did not perform the rituals properly. What they ended up with was a truckload of mindless, frenzied undead they could barely contain. They carted them all to the rally and loosed them on the crowd. It was not pretty. We managed to contain them before anyone was seriously hurt and we’re holding them in a storage room until my father can get to town to lay them to rest. Again.

The sheriff was reluctant to arrest any of the haters and he was slow to get his men together. I think he did that on purpose to let those idiots get away.

I suppose their goal was to show the world that the “bad” zombies exist and shouldn’t be granted rights because they were mindless and harmful. Unfortunately, all people will see when they watch the late news tonight is a crowd full of people running around shrieking and trying to avoid being eaten. They won’t see zombies like Liam trying to restore order and speaking rationally and moving about normally.

This is going to be a tough battle.